This blog is red for a reason. I won't tell you which bodily fluid I wish I had drained from my mother in law to write with it is... but I'm sure you have guessed it by now.
I've dealt with this impossible woman for almost ten years and it seems there is no end in sight unless my husband decides to leave me and the kids stranded in Fresno with nothing to survive on other than our chihuahua and our EBT card.
My mother in law insists on telling my children that I am the devil because I refuse to take them to Sunday school, which I did take my oldest daughter to once and they told her that if she believed in Jesus she could walk through fire... so yaahhh, we're not goin' back. She also has a tendency to tell my children to ask me super inappropriate questions like, "Mommy, do you smoke when you're pregnant?" And when I finally got the courage to let her in on the surprise of our third child, she informed me that I am white trash.
I'm glad congratulations isn't a popular response anymore... that word always rubbed me the wrong way anyhow.
So, I have decided to ignore her, which is a difficult feat if you realized the type of woman I am dealing with here. I decided to ignore all of her phone calls, and due to the fact that she calls our home twenty-four times a day, it has been trying. She has decided to ignore the fact that I am ignoring her and is even more persistent and leaves me messages like this:
"Hello Shawna, this is Michele. I am calling to speak to my grandchildren. You can have them call me on my work phone at 760-873-XXXX or on my cell. I have already left a message with David for the girls to call me and I will text him to let him know I have called you. Thank you for your time."
I think she figures if she tries to kill me with business like civility, I might actually die.